It was actually my Dad who first made me aware of this poem and I think we can probably all relate to it:
This Be the Verse
BY PHILIP LARKIN
They fuck you up, your mum and dad.
They may not mean to, but they do.
They fill you with the faults they had
And add some extra, just for you.
But they were fucked up in their turn
By fools in old-style hats and coats,
Who half the time were soppy-stern
And half at one another’s throats.
Man hands on misery to man.
It deepens like a coastal shelf.
Get out as early as you can,
And don’t have any kids yourself
Talking with friends, family, work colleagues and clients alike it seems that all of us at some certain points in our lives and for varying lengths of time, look at the flaws we have and view them as a result of our parenting. We are all undeniably affected by a combination of nature and nurture (which has the most power over who we are is the eternal debate) but there comes a point when taking responsibility for who we are and how we live our lives is essential for our growth as individuals. Of course there will still be those times when mother or father's past actions are called upon to account for one's negative reactions, habits or behaviour, in the end though we only have ourselves to answer to and in accepting responsibility for ourselves and all that we do, we are paving the way to being free from the baggage that weighs us down and hopefully closer to self fulfilment.
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